80 Funny New Year’s Riddles, Jokes and Puns (For 2024)
New Year’s riddles, jokes, and puns will help you ring in a new year with laughter. Add them to festivities to create a lighthearted atmosphere.
I am a spider’s New Year’s resolution. What am I? To spend less time on the web!
Enjoy a family-friendly New Year’s celebration with this list of good, clean riddles and jokes. They’re guaranteed to make the celebration memorable!
Best New Year’s Riddles
1. I am the place where you check the countdown for the New Year. What am I?
Answer: A clock
2. I can typically be found on New Year’s Eve and you need a crowd to throw me. What am I?
Answer: A party
3. I may fall on a cold New Year’s Day but I won’t ever get hurt. What am I?
Answer: Snow
4. I am a colorful cracker that cannot be eaten. I mark the arrival of the new year in many celebrations. What am I?
Answer: A firecracker
5. In the new year, you typically think a lot about me. I can’t be seen, but I’m right in front of you. What am I?
Answer: The future
6. Every year, I go up and never come back. What am I?
Answer: Age
7. What year did New Year come before Christmas?
Answer: Every year
8. I am the traditional toasting drink of New Year’s and can only be found in Northeastern France. What am I?
Answer: Champagne
9. I am considered unlucky to eat when celebrating New Year’s because I move backward with my claws instead of forward. What am I?
Answer: Lobster
10. I am said to cause good luck to fly away, so don’t eat me on New Year’s Day. What am I?
Answer: Fowl
11. I declared January 1 the start of a new year with my calendar. Who am I?
Answer: Julius Caesar
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12. In this bustling town, the ball drops in Times Square to send New Year cheer around. Where am I?
Answer: New York City
13. To ring in the New Year here, Big Ben chimes for all to hear. Where is this?
Answer: London
14. I mark the beginning of the New Year for members of the Jewish religion. What am I?
Answer: Rosh Hashanah
15. I am a parade held each year on New Year’s Day. I smell sweet and have a colorful array. What am I?
Answer: Rose Bowl Parade
16. The year of the rat, the dog or the boar. On this holiday, you’ll find dragons, lanterns and more. What is it?
Answer: Chinese New Year
17. Steve is turning 40 this year, but he turned 39 yesterday. How is this possible?
Answer: Steve’s birthday is on December 31, the last day of the year. The current day is January 1st of the next year.
18. A mother gave birth to twin girls in the same set, but they were born in different years and on different days. How is this possible?
Answer: One one born on Dec. 31 at 11:59 p.m. and the other was born on Jan 1st at midnight.
19. I start a new year but never get old. What am I?
Answer: January 1st
20. I am often broken, but always made. What am I?
Answer: New Year’s resolution
21. Celebrating New Year’s has many pros, but I am the biggest con. What am I?
Answer: Con-fetti!
22. I am the optometrist’s favorite New Year’s celebration ever. What year was I?
Answer: 2020
23. The day before yesterday, Chris was 7 years old. Next year, he’ll turn 10. How is this possible?
Answer: Today is January 1st. Yesterday, December 31, was Chris’s 8th birthday. On December 30, he was still 7. This year he will turn 9, and next year, he’ll turn 10.
24. I am sweet when I’m ripe. In Spain, 12 of me are eaten on New Year’s Eve at midnight. What am I?
Answer: Grapes
25. In the South, I am eaten on New Year’s Day. I’m said to bring good luck and prosperity. What am I?
Answer: Black-eyed peas
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New Years Riddles and Jokes for Kids
New Year’s Eve is a great time for an open mic with your kids! Add these New Years jokes and riddles to a family-friendly New Year’s Eve tradition.
Budding comedians also love joke books for kids!
26. What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: He got 12 months!
27. Where can you go to practice math on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: Times Square
*Related: Fun Math Trivia
28. What does a caterpillar do on January 1st?
Answer: Turns over a new leaf.
29. What does a dad say on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: I won’t tell any more dad jokes THIS YEAR!
30. What happened when an iPhone and a firework were arrested on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: One was charged and the other was let off.
31. What do snowmen do on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: Chill out
32. Why did the family start fixing breakfast at midnight on December 31st?
Answer: They wanted to make a New Year’s toast!
33. What did the woman say when she was offered a raisin on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: “No thanks, I already have a date.”
34. How can you start off a new year in a cool way?
Answer: Put your calendar in the freezer.
35. What is a New Year’s resolution?
Answer: Something that goes in one year and out the other.
36. Why does the person who runs Times Square on New Year’s feel like a failure?
Answer: He always drops the ball.
37. How do you organize a fantastic New Year’s party on Mars?
Answer: You planet!
38. What did the grape say when it got stepped on at the New Year’s Eve party?
Answer: Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
39. What does a field grow on January 1st?
Answer: New Year’s Hay
40. What New Year’s resolution should a basketball player never make?
Answer: To travel more.
41. What is the official snack food of New Year’s Eve?
Answer: Dick Clark Bar
42. Why should you stand on just your left foot during the New Year’s Eve countdown?
Answer: So you start the New Year on the right foot!
43. What do New Year’s Day parades have in common with Santa Claus?
Answer: No one is awake to see either of them.
44. What did Adam say to Eve on Dec. 31st?
Answer: It’s New Year’s, Eve.
45. Why did the telephone have to work late on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: It was busy ringing in the new year!
46. Why was the Hershey bar bummed on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: It got stuck waiting for a midnight kiss.
47.
48. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Cheese
Cheese who?
For cheese a jolly good fellow.
49. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ben.
Ben who?
Ben waiting for the ball to drop all day!
50. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Radio
Radio who?
Radio not, it’s a new year!
Related:
New Year’s Puns and One Liner Jokes
51. What do you call someone named Stephen on December 31st?
Answer: New Year’s Steve
52. What does a ghost say on January 1st?
Answer: Happy BOO year!
53. What do cows celebrate on December 31st?
Answer: MOO Years Eve
54. What is a corn’s favorite holiday?
Answer: New Ear’s Day
55. Why do you need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?
Answer: To ring in the new year.
56. What do kangaroos say to each other at midnight on January 1st?
Answer: Hoppy New Year!
57. What did the bull say on January 1?
Answer: Happy New Steer
58. What’s the one type of pain that’s enjoyable on New Year’s?
Answer: Cham-pain!
59. People say New York has the best New Year’s Eve celebration. But honestly, it’s overrated — every year they drop the ball.
60. My New Year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating. But I will wait until tomorrow to start.
61. Did you hear about the firecracker’s New Year’s Eve party? It was a BANG!
62. I remember last year like it was yesterday!
63. My New Year’s resolution was to drop my bad habits, but no one likes a quitter.
64. May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.
65. Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up on New Year’s Eve. Middle age is when you’re forced to.
66. I would lose weight for my New Year’s resolution, but I hate losing.
67. My New Year’s resolution was to read more, so I put the subtitles on my TV.
Also, check out Great New Year’s Questions and Easy New Years Minute to Win it Games.
January Jokes
January may be cold, but it can still be fun!
68. How did Jack Frost get to work on New Year’s Day?
Answer: By icicle
69. Why was the snowman upset in January? (Check out more funny snowman jokes)
Answer: He was having a meltdown.
70. What’s the best food to eat in January?
Answer: Brr-itos!
71. What is a stinky resolution for the new year?
Answer: To bathe less often.
72. How many seconds are in a year?
Answer: 12! January second, February second, March second, etc…
73. Why shouldn’t you kiss someone on January 1st?
Answer: Because it’s the first date!
74. What’s for breakfast on really cold January days?
Answer: Snowflakes
75. If January threw a parade, would February march?
Answer: No, but April may!
76. Where do you find Google during January?
Answer: The Winternet
77. How was the snow globe feeling in January?
Answer: A little shaken!
78. What can you catch in January with your eyes closed?
Answer: A cold.
79. Student: “Can I go to the bathroom?”
Teacher: “It’s may.”
Student: “No, it’s January!”
80. Sue: “When’s your birthday?”
Fred: “January 1st.”
Sue: “What year?”
Fred: “Every year.”
Related:
Importance of Riddles and Jokes
New Years riddles and jokes are fun, but they have even more benefits:
- Humor fosters bonding and connection.
- Laughter boosts mood, reduces stress, and temporarily relieves pain through endorphin release. (source) (Find more fun laughter benefits)
- Laughter fosters a sense of well-being.
- Riddle-solving boosts creativity and critical thinking skills.
- Riddles enhance language skills and vocabulary.
What’s Next?
New Year’s jokes and riddles help create an enjoyable atmosphere where people of all ages participate and share in laughter.
Next, have more fun connecting with New Year’s Trivia Questions and this Fun New Years Dice Game.